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    Nice Stereotypes

    Filed Under race 

    I still can’t respond to Blogger postings …. ChaliceChick asks, Is it Racist that I think Jews are Cool? I thought that was an interesting question, because I used to think Jews were cool, too. I don’t know where that came from; maybe because as a group they’ve been persecuted and oppressed quite a bit and therefore I could relate to them as a descendant of American slaves; or because they’ve produced an astonishing number of musical maestros, movie producers, comedians and social thinkers. I have no idea what the actual statistics are - and am doubtful there are any - but it seemed like per capita, they were contributing quite a bit to the world.

    But at some point, my thinking on Jews being especially cool just sort of evaporated. Again, I don’t know why. Maybe it was Jerry Seinfeld, or the Hasidim in Crown Heights, or the State of Israel or just a shift to realizing the contributions of my own “peoples.” So this question isn’t really an issue for me any more.

    Is it racist to attribute positive qualities to a people? I don’t know … how important a question that is. I think what matters most is how one’s expectations color the way one relates to another person. For example, many years ago the DH’s grandmother said to his other grandmother, “I thought you people were supposed to be smart!”

    Hey, that doesn’t sound so bad. Asians = Smart - where’s the harm in that? Except that she followed it up by asking, “Well if you’re so smart, why are you so poor?!”

    The bottom line is that while some people revel in what they perceive as positive stereotypes - and even claim them -they are ultimately objectifying. I bristle every time someone comments that I must be able to dance well or be really “spicy” because of my ethnicity. What does that even mean? Anyone expecting me to be a great dancer or super sexy and hot tempered obviously has no clue of who I am.

    But worst of all, it often leads to me wondering, “If this person thinks I have this quality - what else do they think about me - that’s not so nice?” Unfortunately, those are the types of thoughts that can make it hard to build trusting relationships.

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    7 Responses to “Nice Stereotypes”

    1. boyinthebands on March 6th, 2007 6:26 pm

      Nicely put. A positive stereotype is a setup for failure in another’s eyes.

      Says the chunky gay man.

    2. jess on March 6th, 2007 6:56 pm

      Thank you - I’ve been mulling similar ideas over all afternoon without finding the right way to say them.

      You and PeaceBang have this knack for saying just what I would have said, but so much more elegantly. ;-)

    3. LaReinaCobre on March 6th, 2007 8:38 pm

      BitB - Yes, it really can be. Trying to live up to the expectations of random people or total strangers can be stressful!

      Jess - ha! I felt that way about your religious politics post. I guess we all have our “on” moments!

    4. Chalicechick on March 6th, 2007 8:39 pm

      (((”"Well if you’re so smart, why are you so poor?!”))

      Item: CC asks herself this all the time.

      FWIW, I am not disappointed in uncool Jews.

      CC

    5. Jessica K. on March 7th, 2007 7:18 am

      When I was flying home from Viet Nam I sat next to a man from the Dominican Republic. We were talking about luggage, and when I told him that one suitcase was basically full of presents for my family, he said, “See, you’re really Latina.” Huh?

      I had never encountered that particular positive sterotype before!

    6. Paul on March 9th, 2007 7:27 pm

      Say what you will about Jews, but they have made contributions to civilization as few groups have-in the face of persecution and hatred. To say they over achieve is to state the obvious.

    7. Barbara Preuninger on March 15th, 2007 10:07 am

      I think positive stereotypes are OK within reason. I certainly don’t feel guilty about having them. However, it’s wise to use discretion about disclosing them, unless you know the person very well. Of course, saying something like “I thought Asians were supposed to be smart!” is just outright RUDE.

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