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    Seven Things I Love about My Dad

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    HS & her Father, May 2007

    Seven Things I Love About Abu*

    1. His love of learning and trying new things. At 55, he is starting a new career in health and fitness, has taken up voice acting, and is graduating (tomorrow) from college! He is the first person in his family to complete a bachelor’s degree.

    2. He tried to prepare us for the world. He would always talk about the ways people interact with each other in society so that we could recognize patterns of behavior. When we’d see news about something tragic or strange, he’d help us analyze and process it. He always encouraged us to think for ourselves - “Allah gave you brains for a reason,” he loved to say.

    3. When he married my mother, he happily accepted me as his own. I’ve never heard the words “stepdaughter” or “stepfather” come out of his mouth. When I was little, and people would say, “Oh, your daughter looks just like you!” he would say, “I know,” or “Thank you!”

    4. He’s one of my biggest fans. He persisted in telling me that I was the smartest, most competent, and prettiest, despite all my protests. He always urged me to dream big. I remember announcing to my parents when I was in sixth grade that I was running for Student Council Secretary. His response was, “Secretary? Why aren’t you running for President?!” When I meekly told him I could never be President - I wasn’t smart or popular enough - he convinced me that I would be doing the world a disservice by running for any other position. I ran for Prez, and - despite the slogan of “Why? Why? Why? won’t you vote for Acuay?” - won by a huge landslide.

    5. My dad tells great stories. Sometimes they’re adventure stories about growing up in rural poverty in a small N. Carolina town, and then urban poverty in Harlem. Sometimes they’re funny stories about the craziness of living with four younger brothers - and of the military life. And sometimes they’re sobering and conscious raising - like his descriptions of the sit-ins he participated in, the effects of desegregation at his high school, and his experiences with police officers.

    6. He loves to laugh. I guess we were serious kids when my mom married him, but he loosened us up, introducing us to the world of southern humor, teasing, and jokes. No visit with my dad is complete without some major eye-rolls and snickers. He and Michael bond over really childish jokes!

    7. His unconditional love. Like when I tearfully told him that I was changing my faith from the one he’d raised me in, and he said, “Hafidha, all your mother and I want is for you to be happy. You have to do what’s best for you.”

    Happy Father’s Day to all of the other wonderful Dads out there! Now I’m off to buy some food for a brunch I’m throwing in honor of my dad, my brother, my future father in law, and my best friend’s father, who happens-to-be-in-town-early-for-GA!

    *Abu is what I called my dad growing up; it’s Arabic and means “father.”

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    One Response to “Seven Things I Love about My Dad”

    1. "Birdnesting" and More on Divorce | Never Say Never to Your Traveling Self on July 14th, 2007 6:59 pm

      [...] be the first of “two wives.” I was fortunate in that she remarried a man who has been a great father to me and my brother, and a good husband to [...]

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