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Life is like that, full of words that are not worth saying, or that were worth saying once but not any more ....
~Jose Saramago, The Cave
Jul
11
A Church That’s Too Simple?
Filed Under from the heart, questions, religion, spiritual practice, uu culture, uuism
David asked me in a recent comment, “… I’m a lay member who often gives sermons at small nearby UU churches. Suppose I’m coming to your church next month. Can you give me a ‘Top 3 Tips’ list for making my service connect with you spiritually?”
My quick response to him was a suggestion for sermon topic (hope, steadfastness), call and response style singing, and being able to see the faces of other worshipers during the service.
I’ve been thinking about this every day. Why go to Sunday service? What can I get there that I can’t easily get somewhere else - or by myself? I had to toss out the sermon; I look forward to reading some of the UU blogs far more than I look forward to Sunday sermons - because they can actually be more informative, compelling and interactive. I thought about the meaningful spiritual UU experiences I’d had in the past. And I came up with the following ideal service for me (in no particular order):
- Song - ideally call-and-response; holding hands and/or physical movement encouraged to promote connectedness to other folks in the room
- Holding up - I don’t know what the church word is for this (Joys & Concerns?), but basically it involves inviting folks who are especially needing emotional support and prayer because of something going on in their lives to step up and ask for help; and the community responds by offering prayers and a renewed commitment to cherish the person right then and there.
- Storytelling - I don’t know who would tell the story - maybe a designated person, or maybe everyone who wants to can take part- but there is some sort of fundamental spiritual question that the story attempts to address. This could also be a hands on type of thing - something one creates as a centerpiece for the story. Maybe you bake a pie and relate that to your hopes for the community, or share a family artifact or something.
- Silence - Where everyone can just be quiet together for like, five minutes.
- Do something about what’s going on - This is where the community has an opportunity to do something together for the world outside the fellowship hall. The “service projects” are inspired by issues that are of relevance for the individuals in the community. So maybe one week it’s “my single, elderly neighbor’s house needs re-painting,” or “let’s adopt this highway” - and another week it’s “I went to the public library to get a book on Unitarian Universalism and couldn’t find a one, so let’s raise a little money to buy some for the public.”
- More singing - see above.
And that’s about it. I kept dismissing this as being not religious enough or whatever - I also thought it was way too brief; it took me a while to finally add the storytelling component.
I don’t know why it bothered me for so long that my pretend service was “too short.” In a small group, without the storytelling, we are talking about 30 minutes. It could be longer, if one sang more songs, but it wouldn’t have to be exactly 55 minutes or something.
When did church become so complicated? I think about going to mosques as a kid, and these places were usually just holes in the wall. Sometimes half the lights were broken and there was no hot water. But we still gathered there. (I’m not dismissing the importance of hot water, esp. in winter). When I visited Rainier Valley UU Congregation in Seattle, the furnace was out, so instead of meeting in the gymnasium, folks set up chairs in the front room and plugged in space heaters, and we had service there. It was great.
The church as a big institution can have its pros - but part of me feels uneasy that my church is raising something like nine million dollars to upgrade a building. I’ve made my pledge and all (for the next six years), but all I really want is some soulful singing, prayers, a little silence, and maybe a story.
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8 Responses to “A Church That’s Too Simple?”
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Hafidha Sofia
I love living my life and being who I am. These are selected thoughts about the way I see the world as a lifelong learner who embraces the gift of Unitarian Universalism. BookShelf
Planned books:
- Feminism Is for Everybody: Passionate Politics by bell hooks
Current books:
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Care of the Soul : A Guide for Cultivating Depth and Sacredness in Everyday Life by Thomas Moore
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The Chalice and the Blade: Our History, Our Future by Riane Eisler
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What\\\’s Going on in There? : How the Brain and Mind Develop in the First Five Years of Life by Lise Eliot
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The Double by Jose Saramago
Recent books:
- Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck
- What to Expect When You\\\’re Expecting, Third Edition by Heidi Murkoff
- Fighting Words: A Toolkit for Combating the Religious Right by Robin Morgan
- The Answers Are Inside the Mountains: Meditations on the Writing Life (Poets on Poetry) by William Stafford
- Territory by Emma Bull
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Perhaps the trick is variety — no single form of worship can feed everyone, really.
For me, I like a little more ceremony and ritual than you have outlined. Lighting the chalice, a responsive reading, unison reading of a covenant, singing a doxology, sounding a gong or singing bowl — that kind of thing.
I like a good sermon to chew on, some kind of message to take out into the world. I’m not that fond of being told to hold hands. I like some more complicated songs that require holding a hymnal and looking at the notes. I also like to sit and listen to someone else make music in addition to a time of silence.
I wish that the typical “Joys and Concerns” were more of a “Holding Up,” because often they are awkward and uncomfortable and unwelcoming to visitors. I’m very intrigued by your idea of service projects in the service, but concerned that it might turn into the political diatribe of the week.
Your talk about heat reminds me of going to church in Transylvania. It can be well below freezing in church before anyone thinks of starting a fire in the stove. We used to all come to church in heavy coats. People used to worry about me because I had no coat but I was actually wearing high end thermals from REI under my suit.
Church in Transylvania felt more like a masjid. The order of service is fixed with the same elements every week. There are hymns at the beginning, middle and end of the service and a longer prayer and the Mi Atyank before the sermon. The sermon is followed by a silent prayer as well. The ritual and majesty of it feels very spiritual but the production values (aside from the centuries old churches and organs) feel much more low church.
I agree that variety of choices is important, and I’m under no illusions that folks would be interested in the type of service I describe above.
You’d probably enjoy the services at my church very much: chalice lighting, doxology, some sort of little dinging bell to open and close the moment of silence, a responsive reading, sermon, lots of performed music by pretty excellent choirs.
For what it’s worth, I like a good sermon, too; I was just trying to think specifically of things I couldn’t easily replace on my own - things that required being with other people.
[...] Sofia (Never Say Never To Your Traveling Self) wrote today about a simplified approach to worship; doing so, she jogged loose something specific that’s been rolling around my head for a [...]
My barber is a UU. She’s attending our district leadership school next week. After yesterday’s haircut, she showed me her homework. It included rating the standard worship service in our chruch. YOu start with 100 and then get marked down for mistakes.
Mistakes that cost you points (on this grading scale):
* Having Joys and Concerns
* Having a children’s story
* Having kids come up to the front during the childrens story
* Having announcements
Sigh.
Are there any call-and-response hymns in either of the hymnals.
I think there are many people who would be interested in the kind of service you’ve outlined. I’d be interested to try it to see if it were able to put me in that “good church-feeling” place. Sometimes I’m pleasantly surprised.
And it is extremely interesting to think about worship in that sense of “What happens here that doesn’t happen anywhere else?”
David: I don’t get it; why are these considered “mistakes?” I can think of a few songs off the top of my head: “Now Let Us Sing” and “Guide my Feet.”
Jess: I’m an introvert, and can keep myself occupied for days on end without feeling like I’m missing a thing. I don’t go to church often, so I was thinking, “what would get me out of bed on Sunday morning?”
Oh, these are EXACTLY the things I miss in our life on the road! Things that are so hard to do alone: singing, sharing, holding, stories, involvement. Especially singing.
One of the reasons I often hesitate to drop in on the local church as we travel is that I’m afraid the service won’t have these vital elements. What if this church just does kind of a group discussion? What if the music is bad? What if there is no story? What if they don’t have Joys and Concerns?