Reports from the Home Front

Filed Under being creative, lil things, love, new things, people, plans, pregnancy

Stuff #1: Well, not only did he not know who Cyndi Lauper was, or recognize the blind, black man with braids as Stevie Wonder, but today I discovered that my husband doesn’t know who Sean Penn, W.E.B. Dubois, or Langston Hughes are. Or Bette Davis.

But in all truthfulness, I’d never heard of Richard Feynman, Alan Turing, Gauss, Heisenberg, Von Neumann or the Bernoullis before I met him… so we both have our weak areas. His is popular culture and Black History; mine is physics, mathematics, and computer science. You can decide which is worse.

In any case, we are learning from each other. Hopefully, our child(ren) will learn from us both.

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Stuff #2: I’m learning to swim! After 3 lessons, and 3 additional sessions (on my own), I can “kick” and “fin” on both my stomach and my back, without any assistance. So if I fall into a small body of water I shouldn’t drown. Although this has never been a real danger for me, knowing this feels really great. I love going to the pool. I finally got over my swimsuit fears (well, mostly; my suit is a short skirt and midriff-concealing top), and don’t care what people think of my body. So I guess that’s modesty without the self-consciousness, which is all I ask.

Yesterday, the midwife told me it was okay to get in the hot tub so long as I didn’t let myself cook; that made my DAY. I love a jetted hot tub. Learning to swim has been an empowering experience; every day I see progress, and become more bold. Plus, I’m doing my part to defy the stereotype that black people can’t swim. (Click here for an interesting article on that annoyingly persistent myth - most of my family believes it, and they all swim!)

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Stuff #3: Picked up Murakami’s Elephant Stories (at reader Hotei’s suggestion), as well as several Saramago novels I’ve not yet read, including his latest, Seeing. I’ve decided to write a few short children’s books for my own kid(s) based on people in my and Michael’s families. Getting the illustrations done will be the biggest challenge, but my brother-in-law is an artist, and one of my brothers is very good, too. I’m teaching myself to draw, but it will be a while before I can do anything substantial.

I learned more about my predecessors … my granddad (an aspiring writer, who wrote numerous novels that were never published) wrote a letter to W.E.B. Dubois, who wrote back to him. The letters are published in a book of Dubois’ correspondence. This granddad’s mom, Rebecca, was a labor organizer in Panama, and met Paul Robeson (another person Michael’s never heard of). And her mom, Mary Jane - the Jamaican woman who married the Scotsman - wasn’t of African descent, as I’d assumed; she was Arawak. Rebecca was a pretty incredible woman. Discovering things about my recent ancestors has been such a gift. I feel more grounded, richer … as though I have something to give to my children apart from myself.

I also learned that Michael’s paternal ancestors from Spain were Sephardic (Jews). When I told him this, his response was the typical wisecracking: “So there’s still a chance I’ll be rich!” Oh lord. He doesn’t care a whit about ancestry or family history. In some things, we couldn’t be more different.

So many stories …. If you’re looking for stories, start at home.

Comments

11 Responses to “Reports from the Home Front”

Aaron Sawyer on April 16th, 2008 1:20 am

I like reading your blog! And I know none of your husband’s names.
I’ll have to look them up
Chalicechick on April 16th, 2008 4:48 am

Feynman was a really, really cool guy. At some point soon, I will write a post about him as it looks like not enough people know about him.

CC
Lizard Eater on April 16th, 2008 5:34 am

Well, I was shocked as I read your list, being well-familiar with all. “He doesn’t know Cyndi? Dubois? Langston Hughes???”

But I was completely ignorant of all his references. Different knowledge.

A good reminder to us all that just because someone doesn’t know what you know, doesn’t mean they don’t have more knowledge than you. Just in different areas.
Justine on April 16th, 2008 9:15 am

yeah! on learning how to swim, I remember when I was on swim team in high school I was so embarrassed that my dad didn’t know how to swim, when I made it to the city finals he was there at the meet sitting on the edge of his seat practically hyperventilating… not good. but I remember this girl that I was swimming against, who was black, was sort of making fun of it, and said something about how she thought it was only black people who didn’t know how to swim and that all white people did. I was kinda like, huh?
I didn’t really think of it as a color thing, just as a some people don’t do it sort of thing… maybe thats a growing up in chicago thing, where I knew plenty of both white and black people who equally did and did not know how to swim.
Stentor on April 16th, 2008 7:12 pm

My wife loves to tell the story of how we were in the drugstore one day, and I pointed to one of the celebrity magazines and asked “who’s that guy.” She replied “that’s Brad Pitt!” And I said “who’s he, some actor or something?”
Bob Currier on April 16th, 2008 10:58 pm

As far a swimming goes, all I can say is “You go girl!”. It’s such fun, and good exercise without clobbering my joints.

And hooray for your children! What could be better than growing up knowing heroes as different as W.E.B. Du Bois and C.F. Gauss. And they really are both heroes of mine!
h sofia on April 17th, 2008 8:33 am

Aaron: Although I usually don’t understand the magnitude of their work, the great scientists have fascinating life stories; then again, there’s nothing boring about being “great.”

CC: One of Feynman’s gifts was writing so accessibly. I can actually comprehend his Lectures on Physics, which is saying something. Michael has read much of Feynman’s work. Feynman’s attitudes on life and education - as well as his relationship with his father, have influenced the hubby a lot.

LE - I know … and that was just the tip of the iceberg. Of course, he remembers those people who have influenced his thinking or life in some way. Isn’t that how we all operate?

Justine - it’s such a strange myth, but that article does explain a little more about why it might be so. My mother was an avid swimmer as an adolescent, but due to religious dress code, I never learned.

Stentor - hee. I’m sure your wife got a kick out of that! I hope this was pre-Fight Club. If it weren’t for FC or 12 Monkeys, no way would Michael know who he was.

Bob - thanks! I went swimming again last night, and it was good. I’m learning to take breaths while doing strokes now (very hard - I think it requires rhythm).
Ms. Theologian on April 17th, 2008 9:13 am

I know your husband’s references!

Swimming is awesome. It’s such a nice thing to be able to do. We don’t have pool access, but I dream about it. Or a lake. Or the ocean.

FYI, for children’s books, you often don’t need to have them illustrated to sell them. Often publishers like choosing the illustrator for the manuscript. Or if you illustrate, you don’t have to send all illustrations before submitting:
http://www.houghtonmifflinbooks.com/faq/submission.html#child
Kendall on April 19th, 2008 11:16 am

“If you’re looking for stories, start at home.” Brilliant, Hafidha. That should be the epilogue for every memoir ever written. I didn’t know ONE of your husband’s references–but I’ve been reading all my life. So much to learn, so many stories…. And I LOVE Saramago. I’m reading one of his (The Double) right now.
hafidha sofia on April 20th, 2008 8:28 pm

Ms T - you’re well rounded! Thanks for the publisher link; I was planning to just self publish (via Blurb, for example) for my own family. I never considered actually trying to get someone else to publish a children’s book I’ve written. Hmm.

Kendall - I’m reading The Double now, too!
La - msviswan on May 2nd, 2008 8:59 pm

Well Ok, I learn some things new today myself. I also like your recent book categories, but it does make mine look somewhat juvenile