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    • Apr

    28

    Another Catholic Being Awesome

    Filed Under ao resources, current affairs, media, people, politics, race | 7 Comments

    I’ve heard the questions the reporter poses - in some form or another, just change out some of the names if you want - my whole adult life (and longer). Father Phleger - who was dubbed a “black a** kisser” at one website I visited - has responses that I can only characterize as “real.”  I love how his last words apparently stun the reporter into quickly ending the conversation. I guess the reporter just didn’t want to go there.

    Everything Father Phleger has said, I’ve heard black people say growing up. Everything. It’s still incredible to me that there are millions of people out there who aren’t even familiar - they don’t have to agree - with these views. 


     

    Popularity: 62% [?]

    Mar

    14

    More on Race (and Gender) for Kids

    Filed Under ao resources, race | 6 Comments

    “Seek and ye shall find” … just a few days after I vaguely despaired a little in What Does it Take to Be a Good Person, I came across a blog that is addressing some of my concerns about being in a multiracial relationship and having multiracial children.

    Anti Racist Parent is “a blog for parents who are committed to raising children with an anti-racist outlook.” I just read a review of Weaving a Family, a Beacon Press book about a white mother of several children, including a black daughter. Little “pings” went off in me - it’s interesting to note my own soft spots. I haven’t read the book, but heard about it because transracial adoption is rather common among UUs. Although I’m not a white adoptive mother of children of color, I’ll add it to my list.

    Another good post is by a dad who writes about navigating the world of gender-coded toys and clothing for his three year old daughter.This is something I’ve already encountered just in checking out (sweatshop-free, of course) onesies and basic crib bedding.
    Ack! I don’t wear pink dresses with giant flowers on them, and my husband doesn’t wear shirts with trucks and baseballs on them, so why would our kid? It’s very intense.

    We stopped in Pottery Barn Babies the other day (just to look) and wow. Even the beds are for girls OR boys. But more distressing was that the girl room side had beautiful kitchen and laundry set-ups; the boys’ side looked like a prep school dorm room: bookcases, planetary mobiles, sports, and yachting shit. Again, all beautiful, but if I’m going to be passing off weird-ass dreams to my kids, they’re going to be my weird-ass dreams. And I happen to think it’s possible to be both studious AND willing to wash your own clothes.

    In any case, I digress. Anti-Racist Parent - it’s a great blog. A diverse group of people are contributers, and the posts are as entertaining as they are illuminating.  And you don’t have to be a parent to enjoy it.

    Popularity: 32% [?]

    Nov

    6

    Charity and Justice

    Filed Under ao resources, quotes | Leave a Comment

    Quote:

    A South American activist named Helder Camara once said, “When I give the poor some food, they call me a saint; when I ask why the poor have no food, they call me a communist.” What did he mean by this? What is the difference between charity and justice?

    From a letter written by Kenneth R. Brown II, head of Youth & Young Adult Empowerment and Racial Justice Ministry Team for the United Church of Christ.

    Popularity: 15% [?]

    Aug

    27

    Tag Teaming Personal Racism

    Filed Under ao resources, friends, race, small happinesses | 9 Comments

    The DH and I were having a meal with some good friends yesterday when the wife of the couple asked me, “So, tell me this - I don’t understand. Why are African American men so violent?” She went on to describe how in school the black boys would torment her, and were so brutal and vicious. “Is it genetics? I wonder, if you took black boys in put them in white families, would they turn out the same? The Asian kids in school were so good and quiet, and they wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

    Sometimes I just get so blindsided. I’d swear that right before she said this we were talking about Hawaii or having children - I mean, something seemingly, totally unrelated. Anyway, I wasn’t utterly unprepared; this is the same friend who, last winter, insisted that I was “too nice” to be black, but still. It was hard at first to come up with anything coherent to say.

    The DH, who has been reading a lot of economics recently jumped right in. “Have you ever taken a course in statistics?” he asks our friend. She said she had in college, but it was the only C she’s ever received. So the DH broke it down and talked about some study (perhaps featured in Freakonomics) which illustrated that, after taking out all other factors, such as economic levels, education of the mother, etc. that race played virtually no role in criminal behavior - he could not speak to violence per se, as that is not what was being measured in this study.

    I swear to God, the DH amazes me. We all four of us had a bit of a conversation. I did get a little emotional, but talked about the recent history of racial prejudice. The good thing about my friend is that she just says what is in her brain, and so it became apparent that the root of her perception sprung from several things:

    1. She is a well off Russian immigrant, and she is surrounded by other, (mostly) well to do Russian immigrants; if they could succeed in this country so quickly, what is wrong with black people in America?

    2. She really does not know any black people besides me (not surprisingly), but the little exposure she has to television and media paints a bleak picture. “Look at their movies and tv shows, black men are always on drugs, shooting, and cheating on their woman - and tell me this: Why are there so many single black mothers? Why don’t black men stay with their women?”

    There was so much coming out at once, my brain felt like it was quickly melting. There was no pain, but my vision became blurry, my cheeks got hot, my jaw felt loose. And I wasn’t even angry.

    As all training and rehearsing is wont to do, the AR/AO work I’ve done kicked in and helped me formulate responses quickly while I tried to manage my emotions. To be sure, I approach things from a sense of right and wrong, e.g. It is wrong to believe that one race of people is morally inferior than others. The DH, however, is less interested in right/wrong and wants to know what is: is race in actuality the reason why this person is behaving this way?

    Together, we talked about this for about half an hour. I attempted to address social factors, laws to restrict black mobility, and also the diversity of the black community that she simply was not privy to. The DH talked about percentages, and filters for success in this country, and how immigration is itself a filter: who makes it here from other countries; and who are they leaving behind?

    Eventually, the husband of the couple interrupted the conversation to suggest we leave the restaurant and go to their house for cake and coffee. I agreed because I wanted to see their new puppy. We had separate cars, and on the way to their house, the DH told me that he “really wanted” to continue this conversation because he had responses to her argument.

    Alas, by the time we arrived at their house, it was all about the puppy, and cheesecake. I suspect the husband of the couple might have informed his wife that this was a sensitive topic and to perhaps back off. Nonetheless, we didn’t leave their house until seven or so hours later. We had several more very lively discussions about whether a prayer-at-a-distance can really heal, whether the DH is really an atheist (our friend insists he really does believe in God - he just doesn’t know it); and whether Mother Theresa did more harm than good.

    I’m grateful to have the DH with me in moments like these. I’m grateful to have friends (note: not totally random strangers) who challenge me in this way, and give me room to practice speaking up, listening, and having difficult conversations. I’m also grateful that I personally don’t have to cope with this on a daily basis; it makes it that much easier on the occasions that I do.

    Popularity: 34% [?]

    Jul

    7

    The Last Best Hope on Earth?

    Filed Under ao resources, books, current affairs, history, questions, quotes, race | 2 Comments

    From State of Emergency:

    … if racism means a belief in the superiority of the white race and its inherent right to rule other peoples, American history is full of such men. Indeed, few great men could be found in America or Europe before World War II who did not accept white supremacy as natural.

    In Pat Buchanan’s book, State of Emergency: the Third World Invasion and Conquest of America, he writes that what ‘paralyzes’ Bush and other Americans from repulsing the waves of illegal immigrants (or undocumented workers, as some prefer) is white guilt.

    He reminds us that Eisenhower engaged in Operation Wetback without any trouble to his conscience. Nobody called him a racist (or perhaps I say, no one white called him a racist). Buchanan goes on to add:

    Growing up in the 1940s and 1950s, we did not feel any need to apologize for America’s past, but took pride in all she had accomplished. African-Americans shared that pride. That there were sins in our past, no one denied. But Americans did not obsess over wrongs done by previous generations, for, compared with other nations, America merited the gratitude of mankind.

    He then describes a “disease” that took root in the 1960s, beginning in Europe, in which left-wing intellectuals began to loathe all things European, seeing their ancestors as “irredeemably racist, imperialist, and genocidal.” By the end of the 60s, Buchanan says, this illness had spread to the US, with the result that baby boomers grew up mired in guilt, “indoctrinated to believe America is fatally flawed - racist, sexist, nativist, homophobic … many baby boomers bought into its core doctrine: America must confess her sins, seek absolution, do penance, and make eternal restitution.”

    I found this really interesting, given recent discussions here and in other UU blogs on race and the founding fathers. The lightbulb over my head is brightening a little.

    It was also interesting to contrast Buchanan’s take on ‘not obsessing’ over the past with James Loewen’s recounting of the Reconstruction, and the period of 1890-1940 - the time he refers to as “the nadir of US race relations.” This was when the anti-racist efforts of white and black folks in the generation following the Civil War were essentially rolled back.

    Earlier today, I was telling Michael (the DH) about this nadir of US race relations; and then about the expulsions of the Chinese from small towns all across the northwest and west (at one point in the late 1800s, 1/3 of Idahoans were of Chinese descent); and then the rising up again of the KKK; and the changing of the story of why the Civil War was fought (it really was about slavery, not states’ rights); and the terrorizing and destruction of scores of black towns by angry white folks; and the creation of hundreds of anti-black laws - in places like New York, where at one point 1/3 of all merchant marines were black until limitations were placed on the percentage of black sailors allowed on ships; all the way until today where communities of people of color are targeted for “revitalization” (I just came from New Orleans where I saw this first hand).

    I told all of these things to Michael, and his response - especially to the murders and driving out of Chinese in Rock Springs, Wyoming - was, “Whoa! No wonder Pat Buchanan and the other ultra-conservatives are so afraid! They don’t want this to happen to them!”

    Is that really what this is about … fear of being destroyed? Buchanan’s main points so far are that:

    He writes, “We may call our ancestors racists, as we trumpet our moral superiority. But history may yet mark ours as the generation of fools that threw away the last best hope on earth.”

    This reminds me of a question Ms. Kitty recently asked. I think there is a lot at stake in the answer(s) - for all Americans. It leads me to wonder, “if the answer to Ms Kitty’s question were yes, would we (americans) change?”

    Popularity: 18% [?]

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